


Tricks and Treats

by TheFandomMenace



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Dirge of Cerberus: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Fluff, Halloween, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-20
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-08-23 12:19:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8327572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFandomMenace/pseuds/TheFandomMenace
Summary: It's Halloween, and participation in the year's festivities is mandatory. Seeing this as an opportunity to catch the eye of someone she's long been pining after, Yuffie enlists Tifa's help in setting up a surprise 'date' for the two of them. Of course, nothing is ever that simple..





	1. 'Good Impressions'

**Tricks and Treats  
** **by The Fandom Menace**

**Part 1  
** **'Good Impressions'**

 

"Uh, Tifa, do you think this is okay?"

Yuffie regarded herself nervously in the mirror, swaying this way and that as she surveyed her Halloween outfit.

"I'm telling you, Yuffie, you look great," Tifa replied, joining her in front of the mirror. "Cloud isn't going to know what hit him."

Yuffie glanced up at her companion, looking less than convinced. At her friend's insistence, the kunoichi princess had gone with an angel costume for Halloween, complete with tiny wings and a fake halo suspended above her head by a thin piece of wire. There was a good reason for her new get-up. Well, _a_ reason, anyway. Given the growing number of children residing in and around the Seventh Heaven, holidays like Halloween were becoming Serious Business, and Tifa had made it clear, albeit implicitly, that participation was _not_ optional. Yuffie was no stranger to adopting disguises, of course, but it struck her as just a little too childish. Tifa had given her word, however, that she would enforce the same law for everyone, including Cid and Barret, which was something Yuffie was looking forward to seeing for herself. Seeing as how there was no getting out of it, she had decided that she might as well have fun.

She had also gone along with Tifa's recommendation of exposing more rather than less, a decision the wisdom of which she was now beginning to question. She hadn't worn a dress in years, and on those occasions it had usually been under protest. As for mini-skirts, she couldn't remember ever trying one on, yet her friend seemed determined to pick out the most miniature one of them all for her. Not on purpose, of course... or so she insisted. Yuffie wasn't sure that Tifa was, in fact, an evil genius, but so far she had seen little evidence to the contrary.

"It just seems a little... skimpy," Yuffie said, tugging on the hem of her tiny skirt, in an attempt to bring it down below the middle of her thighs.

Tifa gave the young kunoichi an odd look. "You wear skimpy clothes all the time."

"Yeah, but... this is different. It's.."

Before she could adequately articulate her protest, however, Tifa cut her off. "It's perfect. No need to overthink things. Trust me."

Yuffie looked up from her own apparel to see that her friend had chosen a rather conservative nun outfit, a far cry from her usual style. She pointed out as much.

"You should see what I'm wearing underneath," Tifa replied with a wink.

Um.."

Yuffie looked away, doing her best to fend off the oncoming blush. She had always felt more than a little outclassed in the presence of her friend.

"Besides, you're supposed to be the one stealing the show tonight, right?" Tifa said, nudging Yuffie's shoulder. "Getting the attention of a certain someone?"

"Why is it always 'a certain someone'?" Yuffie idly thought as Tifa ushered her out of the changing room and in the direction of the shop counter.

Her friend was right, however. She _did_ have an ulterior motive for the sudden wardrobe change; her intent to catch the eye of someone she'd been enamored with for a long time, but whom she had never had the courage to approach in that way. She had taken the plunge the day before, however, by doing the next best thing and opening up to his closest friend, instead. It wasn't the easiest thing to confess to Tifa, knowing of their past ties. She had worried that her friend might take it the wrong way, that she was somehow trespassing on her territory. But Tifa pledged her support enthusiastically, and, if anything, seemed thrilled at the prospect of getting to play the matchmaker for the two of them.

So, she had come up with the following idea: She'd help Yuffie pick out a Halloween outfit that would make it all but impossible for Cloud not to notice her. When Yuffie dismissed said plan of getting dolled up just to get the attention of a guy that she liked as 'way too girly', Tifa had reasoned that it wasn't just about changing her look. _"It's about getting him to see you in a new light. Right now, he sees you as being 'just a friend'. Show him you want to be something more."_

She had a point. And so, it was settled.

"I... guess," she replied. "Think he's really gonna notice?"

"He'd have to be blind not to," Tifa assured her.

Yuffie scoffed. "Easy for you to say. You're all set in that department."

"What do you mean?" Tifa asked.

"I mean, you've got such big.." Yuffie trailed off, gesturing awkwardly at Tifa's figure.

"Eyes?" Tifa replied.

Yuffie wasn't sure if her friend was just teasing her by feigning innocence, or whether she was genuinely oblivious to her natural gifts. "Yes... that's exactly what I was going to say."

Tifa gave a friendly laugh. "Look, I know what you mean. Truth be told, it's always gotten me a lot of attention. And that's not always a good thing."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really," Tifa replied, wincing slightly at the thought of all the unwanted attention that her natural good looks had garnered her over the years. She turned back to Yuffie, giving her a bright smile as she nudged her shoulder. "Besides, you look amazing, with or without my help. Got curves in all the right places."

Again, Yuffie fought a losing battle with an oncoming blush.

"Of course, I'd say it's more noticeable _with_ it," Tifa added with a wink. "Now, let's make sure you-know-who notices, as well."

"Right."

"Besides, it's not just about looks," Tifa continued. "If you don't hit it off on a personal level, this thing isn't going anywhere, you know?"

"Yeah..." Yuffie replied, scratching the back of her head. "that's a whole 'nother stable of chocobos."

"Well, too late to back out now," Tifa said, turning to the clerk to pay for their items.

"Great.."

#

"You know, Teef, maybe this wasn't such a good idea," Yuffie said as they stepped out into the bustling streets of Midgar.

"You getting cold feet _now_?"

"I mean, we've known each other for three years," Yuffie said. "Cloud hasn't exactly shown a lot of interest in all that time, you know?"

"More like you've hung around each other for three years," Tifa pointed out. "But how well do you really know each other?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I could say the same about you," Tifa replied. "You haven't exactly been forthcoming, either."

"It's just.." Yuffie continued, wringing her hands nervously. "He's always looked at me like this annoying kid, y'know?"

Tifa couldn't help but laugh. "I hate to break it to you, Yuffie, but you _were_ kind of an annoying kid when you two first met."

Yuffie's expression soured.

"Then again, you also thought he was a... how did you put it? A 'spikey-headed jerk'," Tifa continued.

Yuffie chuckled, thinking back on that less-than-auspicious encounter. "Yeah."

"You weren't completely wrong," Tifa said. "He was being a real jerk back then. Some of the time, anyway. But first impressions aren't everything. And people change."

"I guess."

"Anyway, I doubt that he's going to be the one to make the first move," Tifa said. "But one of you has got to let the other know that you think that way about them. Otherwise.."

"..This thing isn't going anywhere?" Yuffie guessed.

"Yup," Tifa smiled. "You're getting the hang of it."

Yuffie nodded. "Well... here goes nothing."


	2. Good Impressions - Part 2

_The night before_

_"Well, here goes nothing.."_ Yuffie thought, taking one last, deep breath before knocking on Tifa's door. Despite the lateness of the hour, she didn't have to wait long until her friend answered. She'd been staying up all night getting the final touches done on Denzel and Marlene's costumes, it seemed.

"..Hey, Tifa," Yuffie said, trying to sound as casual as possible. Judging by the look on Tifa's face, it wasn't working.

"Yuffie, hey," Tifa replied. "Come in."

Tifa gestured for her to enter the room. It was clear that she wasn't expecting a visitor at this time of night, least of all Yuffie. It was also obvious to Yuffie that, try as she might, her tension and unease did not go unnoticed with her friend.

"What's up?" Tifa asked, puzzled by the young ninja's uncharacteristic hesitation.

Yuffie walked over to the center of the room, fidgeting, looking this way and that, avoiding Tifa's gaze. When she finally looked up at her friend, she was unable to do so directly, her next words being something that she'd spent a long time working up the nerve to say.

"So, um, I think I'm kind of, like, in love with Cloud... and stuff," she blurted out, growing increasingly red-faced as she did. She scratched the back of her head nervously and turned her gaze towards the nearest window.

"...I see."

Tifa simply looked at her for a moment, tilting her head slightly. Yuffie grew even more uncomfortable, not knowing what to make of her friend's silence. There was nothing for it, then, but to address the elephant in the room. "And I know the two of you have had a thing going forever, and... I don't know. I just didn't want to butt in on whatever you guys have, so.."

"Yuffie, relax. It's okay," Tifa stopped her. "It's not like that between us."

Yuffie looked at her friend, puzzled. "Really?"

Tifa approached her, a gentler expression on her face, now that the initial tension between them had been dissolved. "It's been three years now. We're still sleeping in separate beds. That doesn't tell you anything?"

"I.." Yuffie paused. She should have figured that out a while ago, but still... there was always a chance that the two of them were simply taking their time with getting together. It was always difficult to tell with Tifa and Cloud. "So, nothing going on? Nothing at all?"

"Maybe you're right to be surprised," Tifa replied. "I guess it's what everyone expected. But it just didn't come together like that."

"Why not?" Yuffie asked, curious.

"It's hard to say," Tifa said. "I still care for him, and I know the feeling is mutual. Just not like that."

"Oh," Yuffie replied, suddenly feeling a bit guilty over the whole thing, even though it had little to do with her.

Tifa, on the other hand, didn't seem at all upset by this turn of events. "But I'm okay with it, really," she said. "Sometimes these things just don't work out that way, y'know?"

She brightened up again as she sidled up next to the young ninja. "So... 'in love', you say?" she added, poking Yuffie in the side.

Yuffie continued to blush. "Yeah, and... I was hoping maybe you could help me out."

"Sure, but... with what?" Tifa replied.

"Letting him, um, _know_ , for starters," Yuffie said.

"Why don't you just tell him?" Tifa asked.

"How?" Yuffie replied. "Just walk up to him and go 'Hey, Spikes. How ya doin'? Oh, by the way, I've secretly been in love with you for years'?"

Tifa shrugged. "Why not?"

Yuffie grew even more red-faced.

"It's a little direct, I'll admit, but.." Tifa said.

"I was thinking something a little more subtle than that," Yuffie said.

"Subtle?" Tifa replied. "Sure. I can do subtle."

**-Notes-**

Apologies for the brief chapters. Time, as the song almost goes, ain't on my side.


	3. Good Impressions - Part 3

**'Good Impressions'** **(Part 3)**

 

Yuffie paced the store parlour while she waited for Tifa to emerge from the back room. She wasn't given to pacing. Ambling, yes. Sauntering, no doubt. But not outright _pacing_. Her friend had disappeared into the back a little while ago, after some conspiratorial whispering between her and one of the shop assistants.

About twenty minutes later, Tifa returned with a small box in her hand, which she quickly hid from view as she rejoined the young ninja.

"Finally," Yuffie said, doing her best to mask her relief. "What took ya?"

"A little surprise for later," Tifa replied, ushering Yuffie out of the store. "Well, shall we?"

Yuffie nodded, trailing slightly behind her friend as they passed through the streets, which were now replete with Halloween decorations, not to mention thronged with children running every which way in search of candy or opportunities to pull off pranks. She was still a little unsure about Tifa's idea of making a 'new' first impression. Namely, the notion that she could somehow erase Cloud's current perception of her, or whether doing so was even a good idea.

As for the object of her affection, Cloud remained as distant as ever. He was not nearly as aloof as he had been in the early days of Avalanche, though he remained disconnected from the rest of the world. After the events of the past few years, he had become a watchful catcher-in-the-rye figure, content to observe and protect those closest to him, without truly engaging with their lives in any significant way. Even now, he was out on yet another 'delivery', a thinly veiled excuse not to socialise. Still, during his departure earlier this morning, Tifa had given him the stipulation that there be no more delivery runs until Halloween was over, and had made him promise to be back home in time to attend the festivities, a promise that she had extracted with some difficulty.

It hadn't taken a genius to figure out that his delivery business was little more than a pretext to stay out on the road. It didn't hurt that it brought some income with it, but even now, three years on, he was still spending more time with the dead than he did the living. Days and weeks went by, lost to road-side reveries and endless drives to nowhere while real life slipped by. Observing the situation from the outside, as she was wont to do, Yuffie couldn't help but wonder if there wasn't some way to bring him back. It was possible that Tifa placed some hope in her ability to do just that, which might explain why she was now supporting her so enthusiastically.

Well, Yuffie thought, what was the worst that could happen? He'd turn down her advances, and she'd retire to Wutai and grow old and bitter and turn into a crazy cat lady and..

_"Or not."_

She shook her head, quickly dismissing that thought. Maybe they'd hit it off at first and have a blast, and then grow sick of each other over time and turn into one of those couples that get drunk and lay into each other every chance they get, making it awkward for everyone else during social gatherings, and..

_"Nope. Try again, Yuffie."_

Or maybe it would just be awkard all the way through, with two people from two completely different worlds and upbringings and viewpoints trying to hang out and make small talk, which would conclude with the two of them thanking each other for a lovely evening and then not really speaking to each other ever again.

As they proceeded towards the 7th Heaven, her brain involuntarily overanalyzed the situation, an annoying habit that she had gotten into in recent years, the result of too much downtime and not having any real distractions keeping her from entertaining unwelcome thoughts. Not having an enemy like Shinra to contend with made it all too easy to slip into these made-up scenarios. Even hoarding materia, once her favorite pastime in the world, had become far too easy, and therefore boring. As a result, her grey matter was given free rein, and was working overtime to conjure up every conceivable scenario of how the night could turn out, most of them terrible.

"Shut up, brain," she muttered.

"What's that?" Tifa asked.

"Nothing!" Yuffie replied, realizing she had blurted that last part out loud.

#

"Now, hold still."

Back in Tifa's room in the 7th Heaven, Yuffie was doing her best not to squirm as Tifa patiently applied make-up to her face. This was unfamiliar territory for her, to say the least. She couldn't remember the last time she'd done anything of the sort, let alone permitted anyone to do it to... er, _for_ her.

"Are we done with the war paint?" she sighed.

"Yuffie, it's just a few touches here and there," Tifa admonished. "Like I said, you should try using this stuff more often. It looks really good on you."

Yuffie rolled her eyes. As much as she appreciated Tifa's support, she couldn't help but think that her friend was having a _little_ too much fun with all of this. But, for the time being, she decided to suck it up and let Tifa have her way.

A few minutes later, Tifa put away her make-up kit, then turned Yuffie's chair back to face the dresser mirror.

"..Whoa," Yuffie said.

"That's the reaction we're going for," Tifa said with a wink.

Yuffie studied herself in the mirror in sheer disbelief. Gone was the bratty, rough-and-tumble daredevil she fancied herself as being, and in her place was, well, something else. It was still her face, technically, but Tifa had somehow made her look... softer. Lighter. Almost _ethereal_. The change was subtle, but undeniably striking.

"How did you.." Yuffie said. "I mean.."

"You're welcome," Tifa replied.

"Listen," Yuffie said, "I'm grateful and all, but... this isn't gonna last, y'know. Twenty minutes out in the rain, and it's back to plain old me." She paused. "After I wipe off the gunk, that is.." she muttered to herself.

"They're your natural looks," Tifa pointed out. "I just drew them out."

Yuffie sighed, looking glum. "If you say so."

"What's the matter, Yuffie?" Tifa asked. "You don't sound like yourself at all lately. Where'd all your confidence go?"

"Took a day off, I guess," Yuffie muttered.

"Well, there's no backing out now," Tifa said, leading her out of the room. "Cloud should be back soon."

"There's another Halloween next year, right?" Yuffie said as Tifa practically pushed her down the stairs.

" _No_ backing out," Tifa replied. "I'm serious."

#

Downstairs, Cid and Barret were holed up in the corner of the bar, mainly to avoid the Halloween fervor that had overtaken the rest of the city. Right now, the 7th Heaven was otherwise deserted, and they thus had the bar all to themselves, a rare luxury which they were in the process of making the most of. They glanced up ever so slightly as the two girls passed them by, before doing a simultaneous double take as they noticed something was... _different_ about the young ninja today. Taking a good look, Cid nearly dropped the cigarette stub from his mouth, while Barret came close to spilling half his drink down the side of his face.

"Is that... Yuffie?" Cid said.

"God-damn," Barret muttered under his breath. "Little brat grew up fast."

"Okay, boys, we're closing up early tonight," Tifa said to them as she drew the window blinds shut. Her announcement was met with a vague grumbling noise from the two men at the bar, who remained seated.

"We already talked about this," Tifa said, crossing her arms and glaring at them. "Chop, chop."

Another drunk, incoherent grumble from Cid and Barret as they slid off their stools and shambled off to find another watering hole, now that the 7th Heaven was temporarily verboten. Yuffie couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at Tifa's unceremonious dismissal of their comrades. It didn't strike her as being in line with her usual, hostess-like demeanour.

"Ah, don't worry about them," Tifa said, waving off her concerns. "So long as they find another dive with a jukebox and a pool table, they'll be fine."

"I guess. As long as it's free of Halloween junk," Yuffie remarked. "Cid's borderline allergic to that crap."

Tifa glanced out the front door window, smiling as she spotted a familiar figure coming down the road. "Well, here he comes. You ready?"

"Um, sort of..?" Yuffie replied as she walked up next to Tifa. The two of them waited by the dusky entrance as Cloud put away his bike and walked up to the door.

Yuffie nervously cleared her throat before greeting Cloud as he came in through the door. "Hey, Cloud."

To their surprise, Cloud ambled right by the two of them, as though he hadn't noticed their presence, then seated himself at the bar and started to pour himself a drink. Yuffie was floored by his lack of reaction, though not nearly as much so as Tifa, who clenched her fists, before marching over to the bar.

Yuffie blinked. As stunned as she was, she didn't know whether to be angry with Cloud or pity him. From the look on Tifa's face, it was clear that he was about to get a Talking To.


	4. Bad Habits

**Chapter 2**

**'Bad Habits'**

* * *

 

It was quite innocuous, really, the way Tifa began her approach, the same way a raging storm announces its presence with a gentle breeze. She was, after all, not merely angry. No, she was _quiet_ mad. Yuffie had a feeling that things were about to escalate quickly. She watched as her friend drew up near where Cloud was seated at the bar. Tifa paused, clearing her throat in order to get Cloud's attention. When this failed to elicit any kind of response, she spoke up, which Yuffie figured was going from 'Storm Warning' to 'DEFCON 5'.

"Cloud?"

No reply.

" _Cloud._ "

"Hmm?" he gave a half-hearted answer, without looking up.

"Cloud Strife."

The full name treatment. That meant something was up.

Cloud looked up from his drink. "What?"

Tifa sighed, planting her hand on her hip. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed."

Seeing that he still wasn't comprehending her meaning, she directed his gaze in Yuffie's direction.

"Oh," Cloud replied, the tone of his voice as blank as the look on his face. "Yuffie's here."

Tifa's face fell. She opened her mouth, as if to say something, then snapped it shut again, before hauling Cloud from the bar stool and dragging him off behind the corner. From that distance, Yuffie couldn't hear what they were talking about, though judging by the look on Tifa's face, she guessed that Cloud was about to receive the scolding of a lifetime.

 

* * *

 

"You _cannot_ be this dense," Tifa said, once they were out of view. "It's... it's impossible. No, it's almost _illegal_."

Cloud watched Tifa's furious reaction with characteristic detachment, completely at a loss as to what it was that she was getting so worked up over. "What are you talking about?"

"It's _Halloween_ ," Tifa said.

Cloud shrugged. "And?"

"Do you see any kids around?"

Cloud paused for a moment, thinking. He suspected that the nature of Tifa's question was more in the rhetorical sense than the purely inquisitive one, but it was hard to tell. It was better, he figured, to tread lightly when she was this cross with him.

"...No?" he hazarded.

"Do you think there might be a reason for that?"

"Tifa, I'm sorry, but I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I'm talking about Yuffie."

Cloud shrugged. "What about her?"

He watched with curiosity as Tifa got that frustrated look on her face that she sometimes did when her hinting at things clearly wasn't working. It was plain that she'd decided it was time to spell things out for him.

"She wanted to ask you out," Tifa explained. "Or rather, she was hoping that you would ask _her_ out."

Somehow, the full meaning of her words still didn't register with Cloud. "Why?" he replied.

Tifa sighed again, palming her face. "Gaia, you really _are_ dense sometimes, you know that?"

Cloud merely blinked, waiting for a further explanation on her part.

"It's because she _likes_ you," Tifa said.

There was a brief pause, as Cloud evinced something approximating mild shock at this revelation.

"Yes, in that sense," Tifa affirmed. "She asked me for my help because she was too shy to say anything to you."

Cloud simply stood there, mute, looking as though a mental block were slowly melting away in his mind. As long as he had known Yuffie, he'd never been aware of her showing any romantic interest in... well, anyone. He certainly hadn't detected any kind of infatuation on her part as far as he himself was concerned. He had simply assumed that she preferred the freedom to adventure and roam the continents as she pleased, happy to leave all that doe-eyed nonsense to other people. Secondly, he had never known the young ninja to be shy about voicing her thoughts on _anything_. So the news that she thought of him that way came as quite the surprise. Up until now, he had always regarded her as a comrade-in-arms, and nothing more.

Which was not to say that he'd ignored her outright. He was aware that she _existed_ , per se. But he couldn't say he knew her very well, either. Whenever they'd been around one another, they were usually at the periphery of each other's awareness, either traveling through hazardous territory together or in the middle of a confrontation of some sort, always caught up in one crisis or another. It had never occurred to him before, but Cloud couldn't recall the last time they'd spent time together under anything one might term normal circumstances. It was strange, he thought, how you could know someone for over three years without really getting to know them.

His first impression of her had been that of a bratty, hyperactive, slightly boyish ninja princess, and while he could still check off the majority of these qualities as being true, she had undeniably matured over the course of the three years he had known her. And there was something else he was becoming acutely aware of, even at a cursory glance: In those three years that they had known each other, 'boyish' had gone right out the window. Sure, Tifa had dolled Yuffie up some, which helped to outline her more feminine qualities, drawing them out in ways that he hadn't noticed before, but it only served to remind him that they'd always been there.

Tifa noted the subtle change in his attitude as he observed Yuffie from their vantage point. "You were looking, but you weren't really seeing, were you?" she said in a quiet voice.

Tifa was right. He hadn't seen it. It had been right in front of his face the whole time, and he still hadn't seen it. He really _was_ dense.

There was something else that he was starting to realize. Yuffie wasn't merely pretty. She was _hot_. Smoking hot. Cartoon-wolf-howling-and-banging-his-head-against-a-desk-while-morphing-into-crazy-shapes hot. Private-eye-in-a-smoky-dive-bar-monologuing-to-a-jazz-soundtrack-about-what-a-loaded-dame-he'd-just-seen kind of hot.

She was smoldering.

...She was almost _literally_ smoldering. As lovely as she looked, she had also never seemed more pissed off at him than she was right now. He observed her as she glanced out the window, pensive, shivering slightly and rubbing her arm from the cold, her slender figure haloed by the light from passing vehicles. But as she turned back to him and he caught her eye, she scowled, giving him the meanest death-glare he'd ever received from the young ninja, including that time they'd first scrapped in the woods outside of Junon, and he'd knocked her to the ground. He quickly tore his gaze away and looked back over to Tifa.

"Well?" Tifa said. "Don't you think you should go and apologize?"

"For what?" Cloud asked.

"You just completely snubbed her," Tifa said.

"But, I.."

" _Cloud.._ " The tone of her voice told him it was unwise to make any further protests.

The truth was that he hadn't expected anyone to be in the Seventh Heaven when he returned, and had been so preoccupied with his own thoughts that he genuinely hadn't noticed when Tifa and Yuffie greeted him. Not that this was much of an excuse for his behavior. He turned to apologize to Yuffie for his earlier indifference, which would have been easy enough to do, except for the fact that she was no longer there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That cartoon wolf simile might have been a bit over the top. I just thought it was funny.


End file.
